periya thirumozhi – 1.9 – thAyE

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periya thirumozhi >> First Centum

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Previously AzhwAr instructed his divine heart to surrender unto thirumalA; since it was conducive for that that, AzhwAr arrived on thirumalA to enjoy emperumAn; since emperumAn who is the lord of all and natural relative to all, is present in thirumalA, AzhwAr thought that all his desires will be fulfilled there. He arrived there with great expectation just as akrUra came with great expectation as in SrIvishNu purANam 5.17.12 “mAmakrUrEthi vakshyathi” (krishNa will call me “Oh akrUra!“) and as SrI puNdarIka rishi desired to serve in thirukkadalmallai; but he became very upset since emperumAn did not come up to him and welcome him, embrace him, say a few sweet words or mercifully order to perform kainkaryam as in SrI rAmAyaNam AraNya kANdam 15.7 “kriyathAm” (you order it). He then thought “While emperumAn’s eternal presence is there, while he has the ability to fulfil whatever is desired, and while he has the apt relationship as well, the reason for emperumAn not doing those is due to some fault on my side” and withdrew himself. But due to his great desire to perform kainkaryam, he said “If I see my sins, I had thought about those who are not real relatives as real relatives, considered aspects which are not enjoyable as enjoyable aspects, harmed others, did not say ‘alas!’ [did not feel pity] towards those who were suffering, and wasted my time without engaging in aspects related to you; though I was like this previously, now I have now arrived without being able to survive without your highness; as I am the servitor, your highness are the lord, and as we have unbreakable relationship, and as periya pirAttiyAr who will make you forgive my sins, you should mercifully pardon my sins and should accept my service which matches my true nature” and surrendered to emperumAn having periya pirAttiyAr as purushakAram (one who unites jIvAthmA and paramAthmA).

But was this [surrendering] not done already in periya thirumozhi 1.6vANilA muRuval“? Just as those who are very tender will pour water many times on their face when they are tired, AzhwAr’s tender nature is such that he will surrender many times. Instead of withdrawing when the surrender fails once, he will keep performing until he succeeds in his surrender. Just as SrI vibhIshaNAzhwAn surrendered to SrI rAma as said in SrI rAmAyaNam yudhdha kANdam 19.23 “nipapAtha vibhIshaNa:” (vibhIshaNa rose up to the sky to go towards SrI rAma).

adiyen sarathy ramanuja dasan

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