SrI: SrImathE SatakOpAya nama: SrImathE rAmAnujAya nama: SrImath varavaramunayE nama:
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Due to kattuvichchi (diviner) saying the divine name ‘kadal vaNNar’, and due to mother repeating that, and saying that phrase to those who came to inquire, and mother saying again ‘emperumAn thiruvarangam engE’ that was said by the daughter before fainting, she got a little bit of consciousness compared to earlier state of previous pAsuram; but as her lover did not show up even then, it became the cause for sadness, and she started calling Him without break; (in this pAsuram) mother is saying this to those who came to inquire, and feels sad. ‘This is the state of her suffering; (since she is calling many of His names due to separation instead of remaining calm, this is the state of damage to the true nature (svarUpam) of her; this is the state of her not listening to my words; reason for all these is my bad-karma’ saying so to them she is sad. Mother is saying so to them only to avoid censure by people; internally for her this immersed state of her daughter is not undesirable (similar to previous pAsuram).
nenjurugik kaNpanippa niRkum sOrum
nedidhuyirkkum uNdaRiyAL uRakkam pENAL
nanjaravil thuyil amarndha nambee ennum
vambArpUm vayalAli maindhA ennum
anjiRaiya putkodiyE Adum pAdum
aNiryarangam AdudhumO thOzhee ennum
ensiRagin keezh adangAp peNNaip peRREn
irunilaththOr pazhi padaiththEn EpAvame! 12
Word by word meaning
kaNpanippa niRkum – She stands with tears overflowing
nenju – with mind
urugi – melting like water;
sOrum – she faints;
nedidhu uyirkkum – she sighs;
uNdu aRiyAL – she does not know about eating;
uRakkam pENAL – she does not like to sleep;
nanju aravil thuyil amarndha nambee ennum – she says ‘Oh nambee! who is doing yOga nidhrA lying down on thiru ananthAzhvAr who spits poison’;
vambu Ar pU vayal Ali maindhA ennum – she says – Oh the youthful one who is present in thiruvAli that is surrounded by fields having flowers full of fragrance;
am siRaiya puL kodiyE Adum – she is dancing like garudan who is having beautiful wings (beautiful because it serves to transport emperumAn) who is like the flag;
pAdum – and sings;
thOzhee aNi arangam AdudhumO ennum – Oh friend! Would (we) get to bathe and dance in thiruvarangam?, says she.
peNNaip peRREn – I who have got such a girl child
en siRagin keezh adangA – who does not stay under my control
Or pazhi padaiththEn – have earned unparalleled sin
iru nilaththu – in this huge land;
E pAvamE! – Oh how sad!
nenju … thOzhee! – The details of ways in which she is experiencing sadness that was said as ‘irangum’ in the previous pAsuram.
nenjurugi – The limbless mind has melted like water; like a candle near the fire, her mind melted like a substance, due to separation; if (mind) won’t melt for the general fire of the world, would it stay put without melting for the fire that is separation? If it won’t melt due to separation then it cannot be an outlet for the higher knowledge from AthmA;
kaN panippa – and as it could not be contained inside, it came out through the eyes as an outpouring; the mind that is inside the body melted and is coming out through eyes that is outside of the body;
niRkum sOrum – due to that dual act (melting of mind, and watering of eyes) these other two acts happen (standing and fainting). (mind) would stay motionless since it is not able to distinguish what can be done or not done; as the mind that can make this distinction has melted and she is not engaging in any action; it is said too as ‘SathrughnO(S)nantharasThitha: [Sri rAmAyaNam – ayOdhyA kANdam – 87-5]’ (In SrungibErapuram, guhan showed the location where SrI rAma had slept; bharathan fell down fainting upon seeing that; Sathrugnan who was standing motionless near him saw bharathan’s state of losing his mind became too sad and wailed loudly); while his lord bharathan has fainted it is not appropriate to say that his servant Sathrugnan was able to bear it and stood without moving; he could not move because his mind lost the ways to understand what needs to be done and not done, upon seeing the condition of his master; he is not able to stop the cry of bharathan; he is not able to bring SrI rAma who could stop his crying either; so he stood motionless, is the meaning;
sOrum – Only if she gets something to hold on to, would she be able to stand; since it is not there she fainted; even if she is unable to distinguish what could be done and not done, if mind is proper one could engage in some action; since mind is lost, she fainted;
nedidhuyirkkum – She sighed due to the force of sadness inside her; like the fire that started in the hollow (hole) of a tree, not stopping after melting the mind inside of her, it came out as a big sigh; It is said as ‘dhahantheemiva niSvasai: vRukshAn pallavaDhAriNa: [Sri rAmAyaNam – sundhara kANdam – 17.29]’ (seethA with the air of her breath burning the trees having sprouts (in aSOka vana)); thiruvadi (hanuman) burned the place with fire of this world; she burned the tree of the aSOka vana with the fire that is sadness due to separation;
uNdaRiyAL uRakkam pENAL – (she does not know sleeping, does not eat) – state of how her effort/duty as a mother has worked; in my upbringing this is how she is; as a mother, she would prefer her daughter eats and sleeps;
uNdaRiyAL – Instead of saying she is not eating, she says she forgot that there is something called eating; when together with emperumAn, it is like ‘uNNA nAL pasiyAvadhu onRillai [periyAzhvAr thirumozhi 5.1.6]’ (There is no hunger when not eating food (but when not involving in services to you, that is actually my being without food)), and ‘uNNum sORu parugu neer thinnum veRRilaiyum ellAm kaNNan [thiruvAimozhi 6.7.1]’ (Rice for sustenance, Water nourishment, betel leaves for pleasure, all objects (which give sustenance, nourishment and enjoyment) are krishNa, the son of vasudhEva as said in SrI bhagavath gIthA 7.19 “vAsudhEva sarvam” (Everything is krishNa)), — being so, so there is no eating; when separated from Him, becomes thin due to fasting, so no eating.
uRakkam pENAL – She is not respecting sleep. “You started wearing that cloth only by thinking that it is the one that He liked, as said in ‘pattudukkum ’, isn’t it? Likewise this body of yours is also the one that He liked, isn’t it? If He shows up and sees that this body he loves has lost its luster for enjoyment then He would be sad; to avoid that, matching your softness, try even if it is difficult, and sleep, dear” – I said to her, but she ignored that also. pENAL – implies mother telling her to sleep even by trying hard. As said in ‘anAdhimAyayA suptha: [mAndUkya kArikA – 2-21]’ (due to eternal connection with prakruthi (material world) a jeevAthmA sleeps (does not get true knowledge), and when he wakes up (due to His grace), then he reaches the unparalleled paramAthmA where there is no birth, sleep, or dream), like how one does not know being awake (knowledgeable) before knowing emperumAn, one would not know sleep after knowing Him.
nanju, etc – Well she is not getting her benefit (emperumAn), and I am not getting my benefit (Her eating and sleeping), but should she not at least be concerned about her nature of being a girl who should stay calm instead of calling Him and thus destroying her true nature? – asks the mother. Even while her heart is getting destroyed due to separation from her loved One, she should control that within herself, and be such that those who see her would think ‘she is keeping her control’, and make Him lose His heart to her – isn’t that the identity of a girl? Instead of doing so, she started calling Him out with her mouth. (In the previous pAsuram), when she asked ‘emperumAn thiruvarangam engE ’, I thought that she was just talking aimlessly out of sadness; now instead of that she is calling Him (as ‘nambee’) continuously by mouth. Earlier she said as ‘thiruvarangam ’, His town; diviner said about periya perumAL, by saying ‘kadal vaNNar’; now my daughter is saying about His bed (‘nanjaravil thuyil amarndha nambee’ (O nambee who is lying down in the bed of poisonous snake)); from this it can be understood that the first time she was in bed with Him was in periya kOyil.
nanjaravil thuyil amarndha nambee ennum – Instead of He losing His state by seeing her, she is being in this state, and is talking highlighting His greatness; nanjaravu – the bed that is not approachable to the enemies; aravu – the bed which is naturally having qualities of a good bed; softness, coolness, fragrant – the qualities that should be present in a bed are present naturally for a snake; as said in ‘prakrushta vigyAna balaika DhAmani [sthOthra rathnam – 39]’ (emperumAn present in the divine body of thiruvananthAzhvAn (Adhi SEshan), with his sentience, strength, having middle part glowing due to the scales..), as required by His lying positions he caves down or springs up, such is the bed we have got; thuyil amarndha – due to the ways of that bed, one would not think about getting up from it even if one were to throw arrows at Him from a bow; such is the comfort of that bed; (because it is poisonous), got to sleep without worrying (about enemies); (since it is soft), able to sleep with enjoyment; amarndha – able to sleep well settled and comfortably in that bed.
nambee ennum – After lying down on thiruvananthAzhvAn, it looks complete due to beauty, like a gem pressed well in gold; one has to remove the cast of evil eye looking at this beauty of sleeping posture, as said in ‘sa mayA boDhithaS SrImAn suKhasuptha: paranthapa [SrI rAmAyaNam – sundhara kANdam – 38-23,24]’ (after that He who was sleeping comfortably (and so) beautifully, who (even while sleeping) troubles the enemies, was woken up by me who was troubled by kAkAsuran (said seethA pirAtti to hanuman as one of the identifying information to be conveyed to SrI rAman));
nanju etc., – It can also mean that she called His name by mouth, to show her feigned dislike;
nanjaravu – I thought that it spits poison to prevent enemies from coming near Him; but in reality, it appears just as a front, but the nature of His bed is actually preventing those who cannot survive without Him, from going near Him! Why complain about His bed instead of complaining about Him? Reason for complaining about Him is the ever-present connection and due to being able to enjoy Him; since there is ever-present connection and enjoyableness with His devotees also, so here it is acceptable to be angry toward the bed also. The ways of being devoted only to Him includes the ways of being devoted to His devotees too. In the ways of His being enjoyable, it includes the ways of His devotees being enjoyable; so it is apt to complain about Adhi SEshan, His bed; thuyil amarndha – He who is sleeping well set in His bed; the bed that is meant for two people is being comfortable and well set for just One! While for me my mother’s lap (bed) is not comfortable (en kudankAl irukka killAL), His bed is being comfortable for Him! Here is my salute to your love which is said as parama praNayi (He is called so because He is the best in showing His love to His lovers). nambee ennum – (nambee – complete in all respects) while here it is just empty and have lost everything, there it is all complete in all aspects;
Continued in part 2
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Translation by raghurAm SrInivAsa dhAsan.
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